Laserblast Revisited

 I can't for the life of me say this is any better than when I watched it with my uncle in the mid 90s during Mystery Science Theater 3000 on Comedy Central. If I say I had a lot of fun with it, I still totally acknowledge that all the bad critiques you find on the film are justified.

My very first review for the blog was for this film. Here

I just remember my uncle looking over at me, telling me, "You know, I gotta be honest...I kinda like this movie!" Ahh, yes, the memories. I admittedly had no intentions of watching "Laserblast" (1978) Saturday morning. No plans to watch it at all. In fact I was pulling up Tubi TV to watch "Dark Shadows", and all of Charles Band's entire Full Moon Features catalog amazingly appears on the streaming service. That's kind of rad considering I've been wanting to revisit of a few of my faves. Though, I hadn't realized just how many fucking Puppetmaster movies Band made, much less all these killer doll flicks. 

I might have missed it in the production information I read, but "Laserblast" looks to have been shot in different areas of LA during the summer of 1977. If that's the case, my mother would have been very pregnant with me when Band and his crew shot "Laserblast" over what I read was three weekends, using whatever funds were available. Band has almost always operated with meager budgets, limited not by a lack of inspiration as much as a lack of green. He's kept on working since the 70s, though. I admire his can-do spirit even if he couldn't do a lot. "Laserblast" really appealed to me today because I just felt like I was transported to mid 70s LA, Milford and Cheryl Smith a pretty blond, blue-eyed couple whose life is interrupted by bullies, speeding tickets, a grandpa with increasing dementia and PTSD, a mother off to Acapulco for yet another vacay, parental neglect, aliens whose speak is honks to each other with hand gestures, a government employee somehow in the know of what is going on, the unlikeliest of bullies (Eddie Deezen being in this is a gift that keeps on giving), and a laser arm weapon that blows the fuck up everything in its line of sight. 

The director never made another film, but in "Laserblast" there is just this feeling of teenagers sort of doing their own thing, parents nowhere to be found. A house birthday party without mom and dad as a teenage girl tells Cheryl Rainbeaux Smith that no one would even be at her house if not for her pool. Milford just has this face of abject boredom, loneliness, aloofness, and overall disappointment. When his mom is off on another trip, leaving him behind, Milford can only look at her with this depressed stare, seemingly so resolved to her abandonment for periods of time he can't muster up an impassioned argument for her to be involved in his life. I have no idea why he's driving a white van with black footprints painted on the side. When he is pulled over (again) by police, Milford can't even muster up much enthusiasm to debate the ticket written up against him. Later on, one of the officers (Burkley, more often a heavy in a biker jacket) is riding in the back of a police car with Milford, punching him in the gut for the hell of it, and Milford just can't find the desire to put up a fight. It just always seems like Milford wants to chill.

Still I told my wife I would actually like to have that van. I still don't know why Roddy McDowall is in this film. At least Keenan Wynn has something to offer in the way of a tragic example of the human wreckage war leaves behind. McDowall looks at the wound on the chest of Milford, pulls a metal disk from the center of that wound, plans to drive to a scientist's lab to have that disc tested, and is killed while driving down a road by possessed Milford (with contacts and green makeup) and his laser blast arm weapon. 

The continuity errors are rough...sometimes Milford has makeup on his face, othertimes he does not, when possessed by the necklace medallion around his neck. The editing makes sure that the explosions are sometimes repetitiously performed...when a phone booth goes up, they made sure the explosions are repeated over and over to make that big KABOOM! land with extra gravitas. No greater example of this than when Milford blows up a gas station. I was a little confused, though, by the aliens' own hand blasters. It seems that there must be settings on their laser pistols, because the opening has another possessed being literally vaporized by one of the aliens while Milford at the end is just immobilized. 

Still, Cheryl is so pretty, and seeing her still seemingly healthy and okay is part of why I will continue to watch this. While Milford seems totally moving through life in search of meaning and happiness, Cheryl also seems devoid of that. Living with Wynn, her grandfather still living through war assignments, seemingly unable to snap out of it anymore, Cheryl appears to find her own value in the relationship with Milford. When she lays her head on Milford's chest at the end, I do feel this rather melancholic bummer. I did ask why Milford was out there in the desert on the outskirts of city to even find the laser arm blaster, as it is sort of a particularly odd location to find yourself, even if riding around without a place to go. 

Still, I guess there had to be someplace to just drive, and sometimes we do find ourselves in the oddest of places. In regards to the explosions, "Laserblast" will always be noticeable for its one key moment: the Star Wars sign saying, "Coming Soon". This is why I believe the film was shot during three summer weekends in 1977. It was released in March of 78 when I was not even one year old. That "time capsule" feeling we get when watching some of these lower budgeted films sort of comes alive sometimes; I felt that while watching this film today. 

There is still "lazy Saturday in California" vibe to the characters. And Milford and Smith, though playing teens, really feel more like young adults after school sort of meandering during the initial stages of adulthood, without a real purpose. While most folks who watch this, sort of just say, "This is dull and for the most part plotless" I don't necessarily disagree. Perhaps I see more than is actually there. But I found my own value of it. That is what is cool about differing perspectives. I try not to write anything off. Granted I might have a harder time with "Gingerdead Man". But with the camera right into the freckle-faced youth of Cheryl Smith and a return angle of "go with the flow" Milford, it was this moment of awareness that life took them way too young. Maybe I should have given a bit less of myself to such a film as "Laserblast". The talent is still there, though. Those stop motion effects and overpowering synth scoring came from real talents.