Happy 2022 Friday the 13th Day!

 

Friday the 13th '80

Although the film sort of hints at the older Steve, in charge of trying to get Camp Crystal Lake up and running, and artist potential camp counselor from California, Alice, is a possible sexual something-something, I have always felt Alice and Billy were a much better fit, with a lot more chemistry.

Nothing brightens my evening more than Crazy Ralph peddling away from warning doom to counselors on his blue bike with basket or Deputy Dorf on his motorcycle issuing ultimatums to the counselors about smoking grass.

Bill promised Alice they'd be laughing about their predicament in the morning...Pam believed she owed it to her baby boy to see that wasn't the case.

"I'm not afraid."

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Friday the 13th :Jason Lives '86

I just want to rant about the AMC cut a moment. How can you cut the great internet meme with Jason quizzically viewing his handiwork of holding the arm-to-shoulder of Burt with machete still in the hand's death grip and show in completion little Roy's scattered hacked limbs?! Not cool.

I had to pop in the Blu for the Sheriff Garris body break. No way I'm missing that!

I just love Jennifer Cooke and for a few years there was my favorite of the women who survived of the 8 Paramount movies. If you quip with Kagen, daughter to sherrif daddy, you gotta hold your own!

Having kids this time; I think this really added something fun and unique to the sequel. We do go on and on about our favorite Jason's, but Graham can fucking burst through a door and window. You need a Jason to skulk with intense purpose through the woods, Graham's your guy.

Oh, there's this great little moment where Paula is walking in the girls' cabin and Jason is just outside the window following her step for step. Just a little well executed stalk.

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Friday the 13th Part VI: The New Blood '88

I always, every single time, go back and forth with this. Sometimes memories of how much I loved this in 1989 - 1994 resurface. And I wish I could emphasize just how many times I watched the hell out of this. I think that intro, with the narration by that weathered voice, adds so much gravitas, and the streams of line emerging from the mask as the crack breaks it down the middle...it's a hell of a kickstarter! I always thought the poster was so rad. Anyway, I think this sequel and the next one often have me twisted in a pretzel as to why I change my mind on them with every subsequent viewing. This particular Jason design, as others mention, is right in my neighborhood since I love the rotted zombie look...I pop to that spine seen since the shirt is torn apart and visible teeth exposed by the decrepit mask is awesome. But Crews deserves every television set thrown at his head and every mower blade piercing his torso...I think he edges out Richman from 8 since he kills Tina's mother and purposely tortures Tina's psyche specifically for exploiting her power for his own potential windfall. But, besides my lust for Kaitan, this has my least favorite cast. Melissa competes with Crews for best cretin in the film...that she is in the conversation with him says a lot about how horrible she is.

Out of the eight films, this suffers the least from the AMC cut on television.

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Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter '84

I watched the awful AMC cut with my daughter. I honestly ask this every time I watch the cut version on Syfy as well...what's the point of watching this without the very subject matter that makes the films popular.

My personal favorite of the franchise intact.

I'll watch this next Friday as it should be seen.

Whole set pieces gone. Poof. Anyway, they did include Jimmy's corkscrew to the hand, hatchet to the face. And Tina, the twin, being thrown onto the station wagon still kicks fucking ass, even if not gory. I agree with others that Rob's death kills because of its implied pure horror and just simple dialogue that resonates with all of us who don't wanna die and face it before we're ready.

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Friday the 13th Part 2 '81

Jeff is in town phoning goofy Ted about arriving with Sandra in his truck from a phone booth, needing directions to Crystal Lake. They are just minding their own business, without a care in the world, when Crazy Ralph, the "town loony", pops up to warn them, "The others wouldn't listen. YOU'RE ALL DOOMED!"

I laughed a good bit for some reason, maybe because their WTF reaction to him seemed warranted. They hadn't even been in town but a few minutes. He wasn't wrong, though.

I was debating which Friday film had my favorite cast this week. I think I'm down to this one, Part 1 and Part 4.

This could be the one film of the first five that had some characters without the chance to really get definition. I guess they are the background casting sort of filling out numbers. They're at the training and bonfire Jason story scare, sort of mingling with our future victims, but they never get to establish themselves. I could see them as answering the casting call, later realizing they got to participate without many lines. Maybe they had fun at camp, though they were about as important as the bartender trying to free Ted of his beer bottles.

Steele and her freckles with that Scream Factory Blu transfer. 😍

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Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan '89

Admiral Robertson is at the helm keeping the ship's course as the rain storm rages outside. He looks over at the Chief Engineer, asking him how old his baby is. Chief Engineer tells Robertson eighteen months. Roberson, with regret on how he has been so hard on his son, tells his Chief Engineer not to push him too hard, asking him to take the helm. Not long after Jason kills Chief Engineer with a harpoon. So it looks like the child will now have a single parent widow having to raise the child.

Meanwhile, Rennie has to navigate hallucinations of kid Jason, a crusty, obtuse, generally accusatory and bossy guardian/teacher who clings to her like flies to shit, Undead and Slimy Jason onboard her graduation cruise ship somehow leaving Crystal Lake, her water phobia, a cruise ship in dire straits, drug pushers in a Vancou...err.. Manhattan alley, sewers (and toxic waste?!), Time Square, and the subway. Jason is always after her and Sean, Admiral Robertson's wary son. While killing a guy on his birthday last sequel, this time he ends the lives of high schoolers before they had the chance to enjoy graduation.

Okay, that all sounds like such a downer review. I generally have fun with this sequel, and Jason in a club on the cruise has one of my all-time favorite shots of Kane's version of him, where you can't see his eyes at all, just dark holes, with Kelly Hu seemingly disoriented and losing track of him. But the logic holes are even more crater-sized than in previous sequels. I do wish this was a bit more gory but 1989 horror was really a sign of a 90s dry spell.

Oh, I did dig this one moment where Jason reaches into Rennie's room through a porthole and she stabs his eye with a pen...the leaky water tear down his mask is cool.

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This was watched Thursday, the 12th:

Jason X (2001)

I totally get it if "traditional" Friday fans sort of isolate the Paramount 8 in this separated group, untouched. I've seen a lot of Friday fans who wholly embrace Jason Goes to Hell, the Friday the 13th remake, and Freddy vs. Jason. I sort of like to look at the New Line films as "multiverse" experiments: playful attempts at toying with the Jason body count formula, mixing it up. I completely understand if you just dismiss Jason X as sci-fi B-movie hokum, just substituting Jason for "insert monster in creature feature". But I'm of the camp who can have fun with this, just go with it, and forget about it for the next five to ten years.

Security Space Marines with big guns, an android with an "upgrade" with her brilliant creator (and lover), quipping officers, VR dinosaurs and gamers (probably goofing off while on duty), science officers, and nanobite "ants" that can repair serious injury; throwing Jason in there after he's cryogenically frozen along with the lead of the film who understood how dangerous he is and tried to keep him far from any innocent people is the ultimate "getting Jason away from Crystal Lake" formula.

I always get a kick out of the frozen face smash, but that giant hook and screw used on red shirts sent after Jason do pop me. The visual effects for ships, station, Earth "1" are a bit 1998, but I do really like a lot of the sets. I think you can tell there was some budget as opposed to the 1980s Friday films. And I seriously think the cast is very entertaining. We were definitely shifting in tone and dialogue after "Scream", it's clear.

How the android just annihilates Jason, only for the nanos to "refurbish" the remains into this literal killing machine is neat, and Cunningham had to be happy with taking Jason far away from same old/same old. "This sucks on so many levels". Plenty felt that way. But I didn't hate this. That said, using a holographic program to manifest a version of Crystal Lake to trick Jason...that was *bravo*.

Oh, and three cheers for Brodski...that guy's a badass. Kudos to Kay-Em...even as a head she's awesome.


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