Texas Chainsaw 3D

There was a shootout at the Sawyer farmhouse between members of the Sawyer family and vigilante locals looking to kill them for Jedidiah's psychotic activities (Jed is Leatherface). The vigilante posse upend Sheriff Hooper's (Thom Berry) attempts to have the Sawyer family give up Jed so that bullets wouldn't be fired; his efforts ultimately are in vain as vigilante posse ringleader (later to become Mayor in a funny twist of fate), Burt Hartman (Paul Rae) stirs up his boys, hurling Molotov Cocktails into the farmhouse, igniting an inferno, following up with gunfire that kills all the Sawyers inside...sans one, the main target, Leatherface who gets away.
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All of this followed the events of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. One Sawyer wasn't killed...Heather (Alexandra Daddario), and she receives word that an inheritance awaits her. A grandmother by the name of Verna Carson has a letter and an entire Southern Mansion, very lavish and sophisticated except for a basement that is the home to Leatherface. Heather was to go the estate herself, but boyfriend, Ryan (Tremaine Neverson), best friend, Nikki (Tania Raymonde), and Nikki's beau, Kenny (Keram Malicki-Sánchez) tag along, all planning to go to Nawlins after the trip to Newt, Texas. Let's just say, their party upon seeing the amazing estate and mansion's impressive layout and contents is crashed by a certain butcher with an affinity for carving up bodies in his basement slaughter room.

I totally dug the opening homage (in 3D no less) to the original film. Big High-Five for that. I totally felt like those that made this film had an admiration and appreciation for the source of their new gimmick 2013 movie. There are gruesome homages to the original like the body hung on a meathook and a victim popping out of a freezer. Both victims see tragic ends. A body is severed in half (while hanging on a meat hook and suffering horribly while being cut in two), a cop takes multiple ax stabs to the back, and a third victim (a hitchhiker picked up by the kindly group who ransacks the Carson mansion of its fine china and utensils) gets hammer shots to the face and head. The filmmakers love the tin door from the original film so much it is used over and over in the 3D sequel, slammed by Leatherface even to close this effort to cash in on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I loved this one visual of Leatherface in background approaching Heather, Ryan, and Nikki's VW van as they try to drive out of the gate that is at the front of the drive leading to the Sawyer-Carson mansion/estate...you can just see this cloud of smoke steaming from the spinning saw blade of the chainsaw damn near engulfing Leatherface as he hobble-runs towards them. The film even returns us to the meat packing/cutting plant shut down for the finale as Burt tries to cancel out the last Sawyers, Leatherface and Heather.

I was very uneasy about the manipulative nature of the filmmakers to have Leatherface as a hero at the end. We are supposed to be horrified at his actions towards Heather's friends, then later cheering him for getting retaliation and defending himself against Burt. There's also a subplot regarding Ryan and Nikki betraying Heather by sleeping with each other that never quite leads to anything. It is fit for melodrama on a twisty soap opera but seems to go nowhere important here because after fucking each other, they leave the barn, hear Heather screaming in a coffin as Leatherface saws into it to get her, and scream out at him. As he comes towards them, they return to the barn, concealing themselves in before Heather gets in the van and knocks down the door for them to hop in, hoping to get out of Dodge. But Leatherface isn't about to just let them off that easy. Heather never knows of their tryst in the barn because not long after both are dead. It serves no purpose whatsoever other than to describe how assholish they are.

Of course, the film has characters acting stupid a lot, liking going into a dark basement leading to ominous catacombs-like underground rooms and hall, driving smack-dab into an iron gate that opens automatically, and hiding in a coffin that was opened by Leatherface himself (he removed Verna's body (Marilyn Burns; in an amusing cameo, considering she was the victim of Leatherface in the original film). Seriously, hiding in the coffin? He would, even with an 8-year old mentality, know that the coffin was closed by someone trying to hide from him. There's the cop that obeys the Mayor instead of the Sheriff, leading his own search of the Sawyer-Carson mansion without back-up, observing the bloody crime scene, capturing it all on a phone camera for them. He discovers Leatherface's lair, the "body room", Leatherface's make-up spot ("..this guy's a fruitcake"), and other rooms, following a "blood smear trail" where bodies were dragged by the chainsaw killer. Heather literally flees into an ongoing carnival near the Sawyer-Carson estate with people scattering while Leatherface comes after her with his chainsaw. Heather actually grabs the car of a Ferris wheel while Leatherface waits for her to return to him, his chance to saw her interrupted by a young cop (played by Scott Eastwood). During the carnival, there's an actual ribbing of the Saw Franchise that I got a good giggle about. Eastwood's identity in correlation with Burt Hartman should come as no surprise. He sure fools Heather good. Richard Riehle sure has found his place in the horror genre, in Chainsaw 3D helping out the heroine as the Carson's lawyer, working out of Dallas, he was fond of Verna and had actually met Leatherface himself. And don't get me started on the kids leaving the hitchhiker all by himself at the mansion with the keys still lying on a cabinet! How dufus was that?!?!

All of the plot is really nothing spectacular. This is built on 3D chainsaw effects taking the blade right towards us (I never found these scenes that jarring, to tell you the truth; in fact, the 3D gimmick did nothing for me personally) such as the aforementioned casket scene. Leatherface's response to the van nearly getting away, using his trusty chainsaw is nifty (we watch as the van tips over just a few feet from Leatherface), and you get to see him peeling a guy's face off;  later Jed sews it to his face in a nice, fat close-up  (yes, it even has the guy's legs twitching while in a chair, his head in a vice). Of course this film has a car barreling right into Heather, yet she is able to get up, slice the man responsible, and run away as if nothing happened. This has become commonplace in film; heroines/heroes just get right back up as if unharmed after a car smashes into them head-on. My nagging disappointment was that Alexandra's "captured" scene with her hands rope-tied by Eastwood in the slaughterhouse, had her shirt split open, no bra, her tits staying perfectly tucked inside amazingly despite her struggling to free herself. The girls are definite eye candy; Alexandra is quite a babe, and I hope she isn't a stranger to the horror genre because I found her very easy on the eyes and my libido.

The whole ending doesn't sit well with me because Alexandra just seems to let all the disgusting, repulsive murders to her friends slide because Leatherface "is family". Are we supposed to just forget about his actions prior to the development of their family relationship? The excuse that "he just doesn't no any better" didn't exactly ring true with me. That said, Dan Yeager was, to me, a fantastic choice for Leatherface. I liked his gait--that hobble-walk; his appearance is quite impressively similar to Gunnar Hanson, and he carries himself as a misfit rather well. His hurried reaction to catching all those who had arrived at his home, the hunching over, and cold-calculation to killing/hurting all add unsettling details to the character and reinforce his danger to anyone who happens to find himself/herself in the Sawyer home, near his living area. Nice of the filmmakers to include Bill Moseley (he really does make the most of what is basically a minor part) and Gunnar Hanson in the cast during the standoff that turns into a massacre. Besides Heather (whose judgment was often also questionable), the other characters aren't interesting in the least; the basic stereotypes for Leatherface to attack/pursue. I can't imagine this film (despite the opening) will have any lasting impact with horror fans; it will probably take its place as another Leatherface sequel that pales when compared to the original. With the glossy cinematography and all that bloody red meat as this film presents, bodies and body parts included, that edge The Texas Chainsaw Massacre has that remains endurable hasn't been equaled in my mind.