Body Bags*

 

March 15, 2008

IMDb user comments

John Carpenter, as a dead man masquerading as a coroner, presents three gruesome tales from a morgue, provided with ample ammo of ghoulish zingers and sight gags.

The first tale is, in my opinion, the weakest, but has many recognizable faces which add in-jokes for horror buffs to salivate over. A young woman, Anne(Alex Datcher) starts a gas station job and runs into trouble throughout her first night. Loose prowling Haddonfield(hahaha)a serial killer, who has been murdering women, might just pay Anne a visit. Anne has a sealed outpost where she remains locked in with no common way for anyone to enter unless she allows them to, yet she finds herself making trips outside when she shouldn't be. Wes Craven provides a cameo as a creepy customer, Robert Carradine(Louis of REVENGE OF THE NERDS fame)has an important role as a supposed gas station employee who assists Anne before she gets started, Carpenter alum Peter Jason has a amusing cameo as a lively customer, Buck Flower as..guess what?..a suspicious looking bum, David Naughton(American Werewolf in London)as a friendly customer who forgets his credit card and might just be in the right place at the right time when Anne needs him the most, and Sam Raimi, providing a facial sight gag and..cough..corpse that gives this rather average slasher story an entertaining twist. The idea is that Anne is safe as long as she remains in her locked quarters and that we know that a killer is on the loose. Carpenter then plays with the concept of Anne leaving the safety of her confines, in essence toying with the viewer on when the expected confrontation will take place.

The second tale is a dandy at getting under the skin(..hahaha, pun intended). Stacy Keach is perfect as a man constantly haunted by his thinning hair-line who enlists the aid of a hair-growth company through chair-man David Warner and nurse Deborah Harry who convince him to take their treatment. What Keach's Richard doesn't expect is what the long locks which sprout from his open bandages derive from. This is particularly creepy when we find out what the hairs are and where they come from. Special make-up effects master Greg Nicotero has an amusing cameo(..just because of his own long hair), & Sheena Easton(..yes, the singer)is Richard's tenderhearted, but burdened girlfriend Megan who wishes he'd quit suffering about his hair-issues.

The third tale is a grisly affair using "Hands of Orlac" as inspiration. Baseball player Brent Matthews(Mark Hamill)on the verge of escaping the minor leagues, has a serious car wreck which destroys his left eye. Through a delicate eye surgery, Dr Lang(portrayed by horror classics vet John Agar)restores the sight to Brent, but for a price. The new eye, from a dead psychopath who died in the gas chamber, provides unpleasant memories and killing methods Brent soon discovers. Brent becomes affected by the cruel images he sees, and the safety of pregnant wife Cathy(Twiggy) might be in danger. Lots of eye-violence in this particular tale. Roger Corman has a cameo as a physician who reluctantly offers Dr. Lang's assistance to Brent. Tom Arnold and Tobe Hooper pop up as the real coroners at the end with some business to take care of..which might just have something to do with our host. Carpenter directed the first two tales himself and Tobe Hooper helmed the third. "The Eye" was my favorite, but "Hair" is probably the most original while "The Gas Station" is the most derivative. Yet, "The Gas Station" provides plenty of moments that brought a grin to my face.