Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986)

We are the youth of today.

God bless America, limp dick.

They were the Honor Society but atomic weed turned them into violent, drug-pushing cretins. The Nuclear Plant located not far from Tromaville High had a serious covered-up leak (who else in charge of something so corrupt than Pat Ryan?) and because of the toxic waste (of course), several of the youth are suffering "side effects".

I've never been as high (pun intended) on this Nuke 'Em High film as I am of "The Toxic Avenger". The actors that played Bozo and Slug are two of the punks terrorizing students (and driving faculty crazy). Warren and Chrissy were minding their own business at a raucous party when their friends stuck the atomic weed in their mouths...one was turned into Toxie-Light and the other coughed up a killer sperm.

A lot of folks from "The Toxic Avenger" return for Nuke 'Em High. From what I read, this was actually shot in 1984. It is roughly edited and acted...no big surprise. To be expected, everything is outrageous and exaggerated, including the makeup on the German teacher who "goes punk" when Spike gives her a long "atomic weed" kiss. Dunker with that mouth guard can barely talk without constantly spitting.

Perhaps a compliment if you love you some trash, I still think this would work well as a double feature with Street Trash. There is a lot of kissy-face, much of it forced. That and heavy makeup. Oh, and since this is 80s Troma, another old lady gets beaten up by the lead heavy on a sidewalk. Not to mention, the principal's secretary is machine gunned down, her body trembling on the ground while the punks giggle!

If I'm not mistaken, I think all the wet tongue in the film -- particularly from Taru on Chrissy and Muffey on everybody -- was shown on Up all Night. I was trying to recollect tonight if when I watched this, USA showed this after "The Toxic Avenger". I know that there was some point USA had a Toxie marathon in the early 90s and a Nuke 'Em High marathon as well.

I will admit that I almost bumped this up an extra star as the punks destroy the high school. How often did I fantasize just wrecking class rooms and motorcycling through the halls and lunchroom while laughing maniacally. 2.5/5

*Kudos to Kaufman, Herz, and company for how they were able to get the most out of the slimy sperm monster (grown to much larger size) despite it not being fully built! It is right out of the low budget Alien monsters genre, except the one in Nuke 'Em High has porcupine needles!