Never Say Never Again (1983)

You know, the plot of “Never Say Never Again” (1983) was never why I enjoyed this return of Sean Connery to the role of 007. It was seeing Connery in the part, even if perhaps “past his prime” (and I don’t mean that in any demeaning or derogatory way, because he still had all the qualities that made his 60s James Bond so iconic, but perhaps kissing a much younger Kim Basinger could come off a bit creepy for some viewers considering by 1983 his age was much more pronounced), but he was still in great shape, although I imagine having to rigorously get back to that condition was taxing.

 I personally think it was cool that “Octopussy” was made in the same year with Moore and we had two Bond films to choose from. It would have been neat to be an adult back in that year and say that I went to see not one but two different Bond films featuring the first and third Bonds. While I have to honestly admit that “Octopussy” is superior, I have a very soft spot for “Never Say Never Again”. It came on ABC Night at the Movies on a Saturday when I was a teenager in the 90s and I fell in love with it, despite basically following “Thunderball” (which has grown on me over the years) closely.

The action sequences for the most part aren’t really what I enjoy in it as much as seeing Connery work his magic on screen. That ole charm and self awareness (and the never disappointing double entendres) is on the screen, and Connery clearly slipped the role right back on like a comfortable pair of loafers. Yes, he had wrinkles on the face but that charisma is just undeniable.

And he has good villains to play off of, too, and a simply gorgeous Kim Basinger as the Bond girl. Barbara Carrera is just outstanding as the villainess always trying to kill Connery, but seemingly always outmatched by fate or her own narcissism. I cracked up big-time when she set a bomb to be detonated by remote under Connery’s bed but he was at the room of a woman he met “fishing” (his line, when surfacing, finding that it is her boat he happens upon when left to be shark chum by Carrera)…he was lucky he chose her room not his! And Carrera forcing Connery at gunpoint to write a memoir about how she’s his best lover—they have a very steamy encounter in a boat before snorkeling, locating a boat on the floor underwater where a device on the back of Connery’s wetsuit is a sonar attracting a shark with a fin carrying an attachment that draws the predator to him—which allows 007 the chance to pull an “explosive pen”, with a rather delayed detonation…it is preposterous but it does get Bond out of a jam as she has him spread his legs, claiming that will be where she fires first!

Klaus Marie Brandauer, as a Spectre agent with two warheads prepared after his terrorist organization (led by the late, great Max von Sydow, in a nifty bit of casting!) happened to “commandeer” them through the “assistance” of a heroin addict with “clearance” (a “fake eye” that could replace the actual President of the US), has to be one of the more underrated Bond villains, with this obvious competitiveness and barely contained psychopathy, holding in clear rage and jealousy when it’s clear Basinger is falling for Connery. There are some very dated (but amusing) moments in the film that I couldn’t help but find entertaining such as Bond meeting Basinger’s Domino in a big casino at an arcade and Bond engaged with Brandauer’s Max Largo in a computer game of “Global Domination” where opponents are actually shocked if they are losing as pain is added as an extra challenge (one of the competitors must battle the other for the entire world, or for certain countries, using joy sticks to shield and fire at a map layout)…they definitely have an early 80s feel to them. The underwater sharks threatening Bond and scuba agents against Spectre agents in a battle for a warhead, as well as, Connery on a motorcycle (slick black and stylish) trying to evade Carrera and her agents pursuing him in high speed cars outnumbering him are reminders of the past even as this particular 007 film wasn’t of the Fleming “brand”. I was stunned by the Morocco sequence where Arab traders are pursuing Bond for Domino (she’s left by Largo to be “bought” as a slave!) throughout a stone village surrounded by ocean because they are on a horse and decide to “take the plunge” in the drink…horse included and its quite a steep fall! Bond’s ongoing issues with a Largo brute he outsmarts in the casino (threatening a bomb that really isn’t one, telling him that if he even moves it would go off!) is fun.

And color me surprised as I had completely forgotten Rowan Atkinson was in this as a Bond liaison with a difficulty being much of a covert assistant…seeing him and Connery in scenes together (with Connery rolling his eyes and trying to humor this poor guy who is cluelessly out of his element) is surreal but awesome. The way Atkinson adds some thickness to his accent and tries to remain discreet walking alongside him as Connery let us see Bond clearly expressing his aggravation is just gold. As you can always expect, the film has plenty of exotic locales and beautiful women. But Connery is the show while his cast play off him splendidly. Carrera as the confidant heavy—she is sailing on water, eventually into Bond’s arms, while sinisterly earning the trust (and lust) of Domino’s brother (the heroin addict with the “warhead eye”) before killing him by causing him to crash and blowing up his car. How Brandauer can convey an obvious psychopath without going into theatrics, showing it just under the surface (he grabs an ax and breaks glass and a music box when he sees Bond kissing Domino in her dance room on his ship), even when leaving Bond and Domino at “North Africa” (substituted by France) he doesn’t ham it up. His face is more of arrogance and deviousness. He allows Bond on his ship even after 007 came onboard in an attempt covertly…just to show him that he’s up for their “spy games”. It is always a competition Largo plans to win. Sadly, von Sydow isn’t in this as much due to his scenes being cut which is a shame…he pets that white cat and gleefully informs his political enemies of his plans with plenty of devilish relish. Even Edward Fox, as M, not particularly trusting that retired secret agent, Bond, could be up to the task of spy in the field of danger, as Connery often avoids any disputes by dodging the verbal minefield with cleverly protected quips, provides some funny bits as does a cut-budget field weapons visit where Bond realizes that he won’t have as many devices at his disposal (he does have the pen, a motorbike that can speed him up and allow him to jump from platforms with great distance, and a laser watch perfect for cutting through arm shackles). 3.5/5

*the wink was a nice sendoff for Connery. He would never return to the role, so it was a fond farewell. He knew this was it.

**I think this just appeals to me because I know that this was really the only Connery Bond film made when I was alive. And I saw it often when I was younger.

***The opening "obstacle course" where Bond is on a fake mission that results in him making a mistake is a rare chance to see him in error in judgment. He doesn't make many of them when out in the field, as he does explain to M, who isn't happy with his "performance".