The Funeral's About to Begin

You think when you die, you go to heaven. You come to us! - The Tall Man

 Every horror fan sort of has an idea of what they think "Phantasm" (1979) is about. Some consider it Mike dreaming adventures with his dead brother, Jody, against this Boogeyman, The Tall Man. Others consider The Tall Man this alien shrinking corpses at a mausoleum as slave labor using a portal to send them to another world...Mike, Jody, and their ice cream salesman buddy, Reggie having to join forces to stop The Tall Man. Whatever the case, I personally love the disconnected crazy antics of director Coscarelli's screenplay, the only link being The Tall Man and the guys looking to understand what he is and stop him. 

Just a ton of Coscarelli bits and pieces, many listed below:

• Severed fingers oozing yellow blood, moving on their own, one of which turns into a monster fly that goes berserk providing proof to Jody after Mike smashed the Tall Man's hand in a door
• Dwarf minions in brown robes running amok, causing mischief in the Morningside Cemetery
• Lady in Lavender who fucks guys she plans to stab with a dagger, doing so early in the film to a friend of the guys, who turns out to be the Tall Man (what does that say about the TM's sexuality?!)
• Mike visiting a hippy blond teen gal's clairvoyant creepy blind grandma to determine what to do about his brother "leaving him", sticking his hand in a fear box
• The silver sphere, with electric bolt blades that chase down skulls to penetrate, with a drill that burrows into a face, squirting blood (a victim urinating always cracks me up)
• Jody and Reggie jam session (totally feeling like a random guitar solo)
• Shot gunning minions, turned over ice cream truck, Mike going through a window while gal pals from an antique store are terrorized by other minions in their car, TM collapsing into an unplugged mine shaft while boulders capsize on top him
• Mike awakening in his bed to TM standing over him while zombies from each side rise from the earth to grab him
• TM "recovering" Mike at his home after he uses a clever mini-explosive to open his locked bedroom door
• TM and his hearse going up in an explosion
• Motorcycling through a cemetery
• TM lifting giant coffins with his bare hands
• TM coming to life in an old picture Mike finds at the antique store
• TM moving down a sidewalk as Reggie unloads ice cream from his truck
• TM reflecting from a mirror, arms reaching for Mike, jerking him into the void, telling us the nightmare is never over
• And be careful under cars because minions could trip jacks and keep your feet away as a hammer might just hurt!