Black X-Mas



We’re sisters, so act like it.


I think immediately we see, right from the first scene, the problem I have with this remake. It goes right for the kill while the original developed the Clair character a bit further. Those involved with the remake jettison character development, just murdered her heinously, just a body added to the count.
**

The thing about this movie, a critique against it I consider valid, is that the cast—while damned attractive and easy on the eyes—is a cipher. Katie Cassidy is perhaps the lone member who is worthy of any emotional investment. Andrea Martin, as the den mother (her part in the original as a sorority sister herself, a homage of casting I actually did like), does give the film a little credibility in the casting. I have actually liked Cassidy in other films, so her presence here was most welcome. Trachtenberg does show a more sympathizing part of her character when helping get Crystal Lowe (cast in the part occupied by the superior Margot Kidder in the original as a know-it-all bitch, unable to bite her tongue, the liquor just fueling her smart-ass comments) get herself cleaned up and to bed.













I will give this film credit on the art design. Particularly the use of Christmas décor, the use of reds and greens, the depiction of the holiday season, how Christmas lights set off a particular look and mood that really gives the film an effective evocation of this particular time of the year. There’s no denying that those involved in this film set their grisly, mean-spirited, nasty piece of work against an impressive-looking backdrop. I would continue watching this every year just because of how cool it looks.


If you are looking for quick-cutting savagery, then this film delivers what you desire in spades. An older member of the sorority hears a noise in the attic, goes into the attic to check it out (of course she would, why shouldn’t she?), takes multiple stabs to her torso, along with the garbage bag around the head, her eye removed from the socket, all in a manner of like five seconds.


Despite some superior camera work (the way characters and action are presented is really elaborate and meticulously shot), I hate this movie. I hate the backstory of Billy and his mother, the characters at the sorority leave less to be desired despite looking desirable, the dialogue is acid-tongued and oftentimes nasty, and the overall tone is often just ridiculously gratuitous. Sure, if you like over-the-top to such an absurd degree, this will suit your fancy more than Bob Clark’s influential 70s masterwork which was not.


I think that was the point: Glen Morgan wanted his take to be right the opposite of Clark’s film, totally outing mystery and giving us a lengthy detailed account of Billy’s descent into the abyss thanks to his sick, twisted, alcoholic, chain-smoking mother, even acknowledging help from sister/daughter, Agnes. The inbred aspect of the story, not necessarily intended by Clark in the original, is just further proof of how Morgan wanted to alienate his remake from its inspiration.



I find myself in the dilemma of being torn two ways—a tug of war with myself, if you will—because the film is crafted visually by very skilled people, edited fast, action moving at a fever pitch (in fact, I’m not sure the camera stays still longer than a few seconds before cutting away), but the insistence on being as perverse and tasteless as possible left me rolling my eyes. I just consider this remake a nice-looking trash film, devoid of any real care towards characterization or thrills, in favor of just repulsing you (Agnes just loves to remove eyeballs from victims, eating some of them, hanging some on her Christmas tree in the attic of the sorority house) and delivering the material with a heavy hand. The additional ending is just another example of going overboard and not knowing when to quit. An assault on our senses, as perhaps intended, is more or less an exercise in blunt force trauma…this will be welcome by some, I realize, while others will yearn to watch Bob Clark’s film to cleanse their palate of this bastardization of his film. To each his own.


I did find it funny how nearly the entire cast is wiped out in a seamless barrage in like a manner of minutes, which made it all the more obvious that nutcase Billy had help, leaving Katie Cassidy and Kristen Cloke to fend for themselves inside the house. Morgan gives us plenty of time at the end inside the attic and loves to exploit various tightly dimensioned crawlspaces giving Billy access to scurry all throughout the house. Morgan loves showing Billy peeping from holes in walls, even on Crystal Lowe--who had finished puking her guts out after a night of wine binge drinking--as she showers from a loosely-tiled bathroom floor. Cell phones, Christmas lights, glass unicorns, snowglobes: Glen Morgan uses them all in ways to drive home the distinct reality that Billy and Agnes are very real to those sorority sisters. He also utilizes the winter, during the holiday season, and how it can play havoc on escape and getting away from pursuers hellbent on absolute bloodshed.


--Brian 12/15/12

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I did want to mention that while the film seems insistent on giving us such backstory involving the phone calls from the killer to the girls, also the inclusion of actor Oliver Hudson—who is boyfriend to the Katie Cassidy lead but also screwing around with Jessica Harmon—under suspicion because of how he sneaks into the house for reasons not altogether obvious (he tells Cassidy he wanted to spend time with her, but he calls Harmon, who has his recording of them shagging on her computer monitor, and chose Harmon’s room to sneak into, offering suggestions that his Kyle is bedding both girls), that both instances fail to deliver chills or have us pondering possible sinister intentions, because we already have the answers given to us. Both the calls, which just aren’t creepy, and Hudson’s inclusion in the film, really don’t necessarily enhance anything. Truth be told, while the Keir Dullea character is set up rather ominously (it’s clear he’s got some psychological issues), Hudson’s just a handsome asshole who does momentarily try to help the girls, paying the price as others before him. And don’t get me started in the decision to include the Eve character (played by Kathleen Kole), a weird, but kind wallflower that creeps out her sorority sisters…designed (loudly) as a potential Agnes, later debunked once her dead body is found in her car, the head rolling off the neck. Attempts at trying to add suspicion seem futile.

--Brian 12/16/12

 

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