Amityville 3D

I was watching Amityville 3D the other night and sure enough if I wasn’t stunned by a particular scene featuring photographs of the real estate agent of the sinister house where evil dwells with his face actually distorted. I was rather stunned by it because for quite some time we admired how innovative the photographs were in Ringu, with the “cursed” victims of the videotape foretold in foreshadowing through them. Such was the case with the real estate agent, soon “attacked” by flies. Flies. I giggled to myself. The scene was just ludicrous. I’m amazed there ever was a third film, much less multiple sequels after the trashy sequel (The Possession (1982)) to the less-than-spectacular The Amityville Horror (1979) just the year before 3D. I think this film was labeled Amityville: The Demon when I first watched it on Turner Broadcasting back in the 90s. I currently own a VHS copy of 3D, but it was on cable Wednesday night late, so I thought I would give it another viewing. Seemed as good a time as any.

I’m thinking the cast in 3D will very much interest horror fans, with Meg Ryan, cute as a button (mischievous, though, but has a plucky charm just the same), as the friend of Full House’s Lori Loughlin (she was also in a film I really liked from Sean Cunningham called The New Kids (1985), with James Spader). Loughlin is the daughter of Tony Robert’s Reveal Magazine reporter, purposed to expose (and exploit) frauds (in the Amityville house, a couple were tricking customers seeking communication with their dead loved ones; this is how Roberts gets involved with the house to begin with). Candy Clark is the photographer for Roberts’ magazine. So this has a rather fun cast for this particular excursion into the possessed domicile in need of demolition. Even Robert Joy (known for playing heavies) has a part as a scientist in the field of paranormal phenomena (an expert conducting research) and troubled human behavior (Joy has that weird aura and calm voice that is perfect for such a scientist with an interest in odder nature of things many roll their eyes at), and a fiery Tess Harper (as the estranged wife of Roberts) becomes convinced that the Amityville house is in fact evil. I like Harper’s bite in this film as a wife trying to deal with a marriage that crumbled (and a husband with plenty of ego and cynicism to spare), and as a mother she insists Loughlin stays clear away from that damned Amityville house.

All the tricks are once again used to express Amityville house’s dark spirit causing further mischief, like the aforementioned when flies attack, the use of cold to give Clark the shivers (later she’s hit by a furious “cold”; I don’t know how else to describe it…imagine a momentary rush of blizzardy spit), Roberts getting whiplash thanks to his magazine building’s possessed elevator (use hellevator if you are so inclined), and one won’t forget the crispy skeletal carcass of a victim burned alive in her car. Loughlin (despite her mother forbidding her passionately) and Ryan, along with their boyfriends, decide to have a séance at the Amityville house for kicks. Lots of objects (like a Frisbee, for instance; later, when a paranormal investigation is conducted, a boom mike and tool studying for “temperature fluctuations” shines a light right at us as the person holding it brings it towards the screen) come towards the screen because this is a 3D movie after all. There’s this pointless scene which serves little purpose other than to tell us that the house is alive when Roberts goes into the bathroom where the sink’s faucet has come on by itself, a lot of steam built up, and it appears the wall is gradually closing in behind him. It ultimately is much ado about nothing, and he seems to turn the knob and cut the water off successfully.

I have to admit that I was a bit surprised that the Defeo name was dropped in the film when Ryan, a bit too enthusiastic about her first visit to the house (with a nervy, anxious Loughlin not particularly jovial about even entering her pops’ new abode), talks excitedly while walking into each room and describing the killer’s actions towards his family. Ryan, perky and teenaged, even has dialogue talking about her reading up on how documented accounts between mortals and sex with ghosts was said to be fantastic. It’s really Ryan who keeps bringing Loughlin back to the damn place. They go on a boat ride for the hell of it, and it leads to tragedy; this after they were fooling around with the séance that led to a glass moving by itself, flying from their fingers, and shattering. This led to my favorite scene in the whole film, though. It is simple in execution but gave me the chills. Harper visits the house to find her daughter. While in the house, she hears a noise, sees Loughlin (her hair soak and wet) who seems to be in like a trance, and yet outside the boat she was riding returns with a most unfortunate casualty. The whole film seems to be standalone (not recognizing the previous films in details or dialogue; Harper just mentions the house had a troubled history as reasoning behind not wanting her daughter any where near the place), only acknowledging the Defeo case, with the evil of the house not contained inside but reaching its tentacles to anyone (well, of those singled out as victims, that is) who might have visited it. Roberts felt its evil in the elevator. Loughlin was in a boat far from the house.

Unlike Amityville II, this isn’t necessarily a Catholic Satanic evil, but a presence most unwelcome. The ancient Indian burial ground underneath the house built upon it is brought up by Ryan as she peers in a well found in the basement (unlike previous films where a crawlspace was found behind wooden boards nailed to hide it leading to the burial ground). The damn well is given plenty of importance. Loughlin’s corpse rises from it to scare the hell out of Roberts in a nightmare. The real estate agent, given a coronary thanks in large part to the attack of the flies, damn near falls into it. Joy is visited by the monster that manifests itself from the well.

In this film, the paranormal (or as Joy calls them, “researchers in psychic phenomena”) investigation, led by Joy at Roberts’ permission, is conducted in the house. Like Poltergeist, this is a change of pace from the other films where priests wish to exorcise the place. Bless or cleanse it. Instead, Joy opts to study the house so that Roberts can hopefully convince Harper that what she saw (wet mute Loughlin) was not real (Harper is convinced that Loughlin was real, not a figment of her delusion, a ‘fantasy’ brought on by denial). It would also give Joy a chance to finally usurp any further claims that the Defeo Amityville house was befallen of evil spirits from hell or the burial ground.

Roberts had been in the likes of Annie Hall & Stardust Memories for Woody Allen prior to this; I can only imagine a good joke could have been used for his involvement in Amityville 3. Tess Harper was coming off of the wonderful Robert Duvall vehicle, Tender Mercies. Neither really deserved to languish in this turkey, but nonetheless, here they are. The house literally explodes (or maybe, implodes is better suited for the house blowing into pieces) at the end, but not before tossing around furniture and doors (and Joy’s paranormal crew), with windows breaking…even a swordfish (!) comes off the wall, nearly stabbing Roberts (instead sticking in the nearby wall). Roberts uses himself as a shield for the mostly aloof Harper (who never seems to recover herself after Loughlin’s departure) as the chaos ensues around them (while others are hurled from the house like rag dolls, these two seem to escape all the house’s rage). Poor Joy tries to do the right thing, believing the house’s evil is using Loughlin against Harper to, I’m guessing, gain another soul to exploit for its own kicks, peering into the (soon to be) bubbling well in the basement that pops up a demon that breathes fire into his face! Joy’s face is burned as a result, with the obvious scream of fear, and soon he’s pulled into “wherever the well leads to” (hell, perhaps?). That’s where the Amityville house has its temper tantrum, with little left standing afterward (think the very end of The Curse (1987)). The “spirit” of, again I’m guessing, Loughlin, in this purple mist, lures Harper (and soon, both Roberts and Joy) to the basement; this bit of special effects was probably far more cool then than it is now (we’re spoiled, folks). The monster from the well just kind of left my mouth agape; Joy’s shriek had me chuckling. The house coming unglued, however, was kind of neat, to me. I like that the filmmakers decided it was time to blow that house to bits and pieces; it was kind of a final gasp for the franchise before “possessed items” from the house decided to torment future victims. It was for the best, really. The Hollywood Machine, though, wasn’t bound to let the infamous house stay off the market…no sir; a remake would conjure that bad boy from the ruins with Ryan taking the reins from Brolin.

I haven’t seen very many of the films inspired by the original (many are labeled sequels, but few really “feel” like part  of the franchise because the house itself was a major asset no longer available to give that sinister aura by its sheer appearance). I would like to see the next sequel, though, with Patty Duke, called “The Evil Escapes”.  It is a made-for-television movie about a lamp from the Amityville house. I’ve seen Amityville: A New Generation (…which I thought sucked ass) and Amityville Dollhouse (a film I rather liked actually; although I haven’t seen it but once back in 1996 (when I was around 19!)). I think that Amityville: The Possession & Amityville 3D exhausted any remaining value (what little there was that existed in the very first film) left over from the original film from '79. Priests and Demons & Incest, Abusive Fathers, Paranormal Activity, and a Bubbling Well: the franchise was in tatters by the end of the third film. Others were willing, though, to take the scraps that were left in the wreckage and gnaw away.